Tuesday, January 20, 2026

Real Women Fart


They say that everyone farts between 10 and 20 times a day. Sometimes it may be loud and odorless, or smelly. Sometimes it's really smelly, sometimes it's silent but deadly.

One of the great inconveniences of riding public transportation is that you are at the mercy of people. Sometimes you take the bus or the train, and its so crowded that it feels like you are inside a pack of sardines.

On this particular day, I was running late for a health center staff meeting. I hopped on the crowded Market Frankford Line, politely made my way toward the middle of the train and grabbed the overhead grab rail to keep myself from bumping into people. There was no room to move.

And then it hit me ....

A well-dressed elegant woman standing in front of me farted. The foul smell resembling the smell of rotten eggs was so intense that the stench burned my nostrils and made my eyes water. I looked the other way to try to get away from her, and to prevent myself from fainting. I could barely breathe. 

The train was so packed with commuters that there was no room to move anywhere. I thought her silent deadly fart was peeling the paint off the walls. Interestingly, people around us totally ignored the rotten smell and no one seemed to notice.

It was the longest most uncomfortable train ride of my life. Just another day riding the infamous Philadelphia Market Frankford Line.

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